I've been through it all, baby, I'm mother courage...

"Don't give people who treat you poorly any of your attention or energy because they don't deserve it - save yourself for the people who are good to you. Hang in there. Give yourself time to work through this because it will take you time to get over it, and be kind to yourself. Although its tough now, this is a tiny part of your life." xx

“This life is what you make it. No matter what, you're going to mess up sometimes, it's a universal truth. But the good part is you get to decide how you're going to mess it up. Girls will be your friends - they'll act like it anyway. But just remember, some come, some go. The ones that stay with you through everything - they're your true best friends. Don't let go of them. Also remember, sisters make the best friends in the world. As for lovers, well, they'll come and go too. And babe, I hate to say it, most of them - actually pretty much all of them are going to break your heart, but you can't give up becuase if you give up, you'll never find your soul mate. You'll never find that half who makes you whole and that goes for everything. Just because you fail once, doesn't mean you're gonna fail at everything. Keep trying, hold on, and always, always, always believe in yourself, because if you don't, then who will, sweetie? So keep your head high, keep your chin up, and most importantly, keep smiling, because life's a beautiful thing and there's so much to smile about.” 

― Marilyn Monroe

On the way home from Chester (after going for a university applicant day), I had to get the train from Chester to Crewe, then Crewe to Derby. You see the first train was running late, and we made the second train by like a minute. 

Why am I telling you this? Because today I saw my parents run. Yes it did actually happen. It's not everyday something this hilarious happens, especially not when I'm with my parents.


Although I can't decide whether that was more funny, or whether the guy who was sat behind me on the train was more funny - although it was starting to get a little creepy and weird.

Breakfast At Tiffany's :)

“You’re wrong. She is a phony. But on the other hand you’re right. She isn’t a phony because she’s a real phony. She believes all this crap she believes. You can’t talk her out of it. I’ve tried with tears running down my cheeks. Benny Polan, respected everywhere, Benny Polan tried. Benny had it on his mind to marry her, she don’t go for it, Benny spent maybe thousands sending her to head-shrinkers. Even the famous one, the one can only speak German, boy, did he throw in the towel. You cant talk her out of these” – he made a fist, as though to crush an intangible – “ideas. Try it some time. Get her to tell you some of the stuff she believes. Mind you,” he said, “I like the kid. Everybody does, but there’s lots that don’t. I do. I sincerely like the kid. I’m sensitive, that’s why. You’ve got to be sensitive to appreciate her: a streak of the poet. But I’ll tell you the truth. You can beat your brains out for her, and she’ll hand you horseshit on a platter. To give an example – who is she like you see her today? She’s strictly a girl you’ll read where she ends up at the bottom of Seconals. I’ve seen it happen more times than you’ve got toes: and those kids, they weren’t even nuts. She’s nuts.”

“But young. And with a great deal of youth ahead of her.”

“If you mean future, you’re wrong again. Now a couple of years back, out on the Coast, there was a time it could’ve been different. She had something working for her, she had them interested, she could’ve really rolled. But when you walk out on a thing like that, you don’t walk back. Ask Luise Rainer. And Rainer was a star. Sure, Holly was no star; she never got out of the still department. But that was before the story of Dr Wassell. Then she could’ve really rolled. I know, see, cause I’m the guy was giving her the push.” He pointed his cigar at himself. “O.J Berman”.

He expected recognition, and I didn’t mind obliging him, it was all right by me, except that I’d never heard of O.J Berman. It developed that he was a Hollywood actor’s agent.

“I’m the first one saw her. Out at Santa Anita. She’s hanging around the track every day. I’m interested: professionally. I find out she’s some jocks regular, she’s living with the shrimp. I get the jock told Drop It if he don’t want conversation with the vice boys: see, the kid’s fifteen. But stylish: she’s okay, she comes across. Even when she’s wearing glasses this thick; even when she opens her mouth and you don’t know if she’s a hillbilly or an Okie or what. I still don’t. My guess, nobody’ll ever know where she came from. She’s such a goddamn liar, maybe she don’t even know herself anymore. But it took us a year to smooth out that accent, How we finally did it, we gave her French lessons: after she could imitate French, it wasn’t so long she could imitate English. We modelled her along the Margaret Sullivan type, but she could pitch some curves of her own, people were interested, big ones, and to top it all, Benny Polan, a respected guy, Benny wants to marry her. An agent could ask for more? Then wham! The Story of Dr Wassell. You see that picture? Cecil B. DeMille. Gary Cooper. Jesus. I kill myself, its all set: they’re going to test her for the part of Dr Wassell’s nurse. One of his nurses anyway. Then wham! The phone rings.” He picked a telephone out of the air and held it to his ear. “She says, this is Holly, I say honey, you sound far away, she says I’m in New York, I say what the hell are you doing in New York when its Sunday and you got the test tomorrow? She says I’m in New York cause I’ve never been to New York. I say get your ass on a plane and get back here, she says I don’t want it. I say what’s your angle, doll? She says you got to want it to be good and I don’t want it, I say well, what the hell do you want, and she says when I find out you’ll be the first to know. See what I mean: horseshit on a platter.”  <3

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